Search results for "Benedict XVI"

This pretty much sums up this Pope nonsense

Here's a video of Benedict XVI's appointment, except the audio has been replaced with a bunch of hilarious nonsense; something all of these clowns in ridiculous outfits should be well versed in. Just look at all the ridiculous wealth on display here. Kind makes you want to vomit in your mouth a little, doesn't it? ...

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Dutch Catholics desperate to jump ship after Pope’s bigoted speech

The world is changing, but this isn't a fact that pleases the Catholic Church too much. Concerned their ability to dictate the lives of their fellow human beings is waning, the Pope recently addressed his fellow Catholics to wish them a joyous Christmas, and attempted to convince the world that two dudes trying to marry one another was a threat to world peace, and goes against nature (kind of like celibacy, ...

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Pedophile priest blames God for making him this way

I've heard a lot of tortured explanations from the Catholic Church over the years as to why so many priests are sexually abusing children. Pope Benedict XVI claimed it was increased secularization that somehow made their theists behave so immorally. Homosexuality has also been blamed, despite the fact that as many female children are abused as males. Finally, though, one pedophile priest by the name of Davi ...

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Pope’s butler faces jail time for leaked memos

OK, so remember how the US finally jailed their first priest for covering up sexual abuse? We all felt as though this was a positive sign of things to come, didn't we? Well, as great as that felt, it seems as though justice is slow in coming to the Vatican. Jailing the Pope's butler for leaking damning memos demonstrating the extent of corruption is a bigger priority for these fuckers. Pope Benedict XVI's b ...

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Pope denounces Maryland legalizing gay marriage

Pope Benedict XVI, a celibate man who controls a vast fortune and an army of delusional homophobes, has criticized Americans for granting all their citizens the same rights in the state of Maryland. "He added that the traditional family and marriage had to be "defended from every possible misrepresentation of their true nature" because, he said, whatever injured families injured society. So many ruined live ...

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Catholic priest in charge of sex scandal caught with kiddy porn

It's beginning to look like any effort to "clean up" the Catholic church of pedophiles is an impossible task. Consider this: Pope Benedict XVI's right hand man in charge of helping him track down pedo priests, Father Riccardo Seppia, was arrested last May when he was caught trying to arrange sexual encounters with his drug dealer. Now, it seems as though another priest in charge of investigating pederasts h ...

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IHOP calls Oprah Winfrey the Anti-Christ

Here's what's fucking scary about believers: some of them take it so seriously that concerns over their own well-being is secondary. For true believers, a tiny bunk-bed, barely enough food to subsist, and countless hours spent trying to recruit new zombies isn't a chore; it's a calling, baby! It is how a pathetically small church, with the hilarious acronym of IHOP (International House of Prayer, not Pancak ...

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Hot nun gets the shaft

I have to admit I've always wanted to write this headline, but do you have any idea how long I had to wait before a super hot nun got fired? But boy, was this girl worth the wait. Turns out that a former lap-dancer turned dancing Nun was a bit too much for the Vatican to handle, and so Benedict XVI shut it down. The Santa Croce in Gerusalemme church is being closed because of rumours of a lack of liturgical ...

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Catholic Church’s latest scandal

Whenever I hear the words Vatican and "reform", I can't help but laugh. Here's an institution that, for a greater part of Western history, has benefited from unchecked powers. It wasn't until the 19th century the Papal States were annexed, and even then, fascist dictator Mussolini allowed the organization "statehood" in exchange for cooperation in his new government. Now, this archaic and evil organization ...

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Scooby-Don’t

I've gotten a few emails asking me why I bothered to feature a comic section when most of them appear to be dated last October. Well, that's because the comics are making a comeback in 2011, and I thought I might give you a little preview. Since I talked about Joseph Ratzinger on my last Bonus show (I refuse to call this guy by his role-playing nickname, Benedict XVI) in light of all the new revelations of ...

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