I’ve gotten a few emails asking me why I bothered to feature a comic section when most of them appear to be dated last October. Well, that’s because the comics are making a comeback in 2011, and I thought I might give you a little preview. Since I talked about Joseph Ratzinger on my last Bonus show (i refuse to call this guy by his role-playing nickname, Benedict XVI) in light of all the new revelations of priestly abuse in Germany, this comic needs to go up.

So stay tuned in 2011 for some new comics, and thanks for all you members out there that continue to support what I do. It would all be impossible without your patronage.

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There are lots of reasons to dislike Tony Blair. The fact that he supported and participated in the War in Iraq already qualifies him as downright dastardly, and his growing religiosity is becoming a matter of serious concern. He’s made no bones about trying to be President of the European Council, and considering Europe is largely secular, his recent statements should alarm any atheist or agnostic living there:

We face the challenge of relevance – showing how faith can be a force for the future, for progress, that it will not fade as science, technology and material prosperity alters the way we live. We face an aggressive secular attack from without. We face the threat of extremism from within.

Those who scorn God and those who do violence in God’s name, both represent views of religion. But both offer no hope for faith in the twenty first century.

What the fuck is this asshole talking about? Is he equating sectarian violence with peaceful secular protest? Does he really believe that atheism is the root of evil? This is the same man who followed religious nutbag George W. Bush into Babylon, claiming the lives of hundreds of thousands of Iraqis; and for what? Oil? Yeah, the secular left who opposed this tragedy of a war must be the bad guys. Can’t you just see us strapping ourselves to explosives and murdering innocent civilians all in the name of no God? I wonder what that would look like…

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So apparently the Bible is way too liberal for some. The Conservative Bible Project is the inspired project of Conservapedia, that great resource of idiocy, backwardness, and general ignorance. They’ve decided that the Bible needed to be expunged of the “socialist” elements, such as the use of “comrade”, labor, and “volunteer”. They also want it to reflect their free market ideals:

Accept the Logic of Hell: applying logic with its full force and effect, as in not denying or downplaying the very real existence of Hell or the Devil.

Express Free Market Parables; explaining the numerous economic parables with their full free-market meaning

Obviously no one can stop these psychos from taking an already scary tome and editing all the peaceful and beneficial elements out of it. What we should do, on the other hand, is use this opportunity to show just how often religious manuals are manipulated and changed to fit the particular mores of the times. Conservatives have a gigantic hard-on for two things: Jesus, and money, and so their Bible will be an eclectic mix of Adam Smith’s “Wealth of Nations” and Rush Limbaugh’s “The Way Things Ought to Be”.

Do we need to remind these guys that Jesus did not invent Capitalism? I know they want to make greed their religion, but that shit is just getting totally out of control here. Can we all collectively agree that these people are insane?

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This comic is dedicated to Ray’s blog “Atheist Central“, where he recently responded to the discovery of Ardipithecus ramidus. As usual, Ray is busy accusing scientists of making shit up. He’s so deluded that the fool doesn’t even realize the irony of him calling Evolution “faith based” (does he think that’s a good or a bad thing also? I’m confused).

I’m no longer surprised when idiots like Ray Comfort flatly deny the evidence for evolution, but I draw the line when these same jerkoffs say that science is somehow “faith based”, while simultaneously claiming that their own convoluted belief system is supposedly supported by evidence. What evidence? What the hell is this fucking moron talking about?

You know, for the most part scientists are too busy actually doing science to even bother paying attention to these guys. In the old days, we used to think that all we needed to do was ignore these morons and that they would somehow magically go away. That didn’t work out so well. Then we tried to debate them, going on various news programs trying to defend what is perhaps the most widely tested scientific theory of all time. So far, that hasn’t worked either.

These people aren’t interested in the truth, and they certainly aren’t interested in any real debate. Ray comfort and his ilk are either deliberately lying (which is what I suspect), or consciously trying to ignore anything that conflicts with their predetermined world view.You can’t win a debate with someone who refuses to accept the rules of logic, so why are we so busy abiding by them when they don’t?

If you want to want to keep wasting your time trying to argue with intellectual midgets, be my guest. Personally I’m done playing Mr. Nice Guy. If it’s war they want, it’s war they’ll get!

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I’ve always been both repulsed and annoyed at the way religious organizations exploit the poor. How many times have I seen or read of preachers pressuring their flock to give when their own cupboards are empty? Too many to count I imagine.  Elder Lynn G. Robbins is a businessman and high ranking member of the Church of Latter-Day Saints. He wrote an article a while back calling on the destitute to obey the “law of the tithing”. If you’re not aware what tithing means, it’s basically 10% of your income that goes automatically to the church.

Lynn ironically enough begins with Charles Dickens’ immortal A Christmas Carol, citing how men like Scrooge find it inconvenient to be charitable. It should be noted that Lynn is the founder and owner of a company called FranklinCovey, which specializes in time management training. In 2005, their revenue was over 280 million dollars. No word on how much he sacrifices to the church in terms of his own income, but I’m willing to bet it isn’t anywhere near what he recommends others give:

When serving a meal, it is much easier to set one more plate at the beginning of the meal than it is to find food for a latecomer once the meal is over and the food has been served. Likewise, isn’t it actually easier to give the Lord the firstlings or the firstfruits than it is to hope that there are sufficient “leftovers” for Him? As the founder of our feast, shouldn’t He be the guest of honor, the first to be served?

Since when does a supposedly All Powerful Entity need fucking money? Is he broke or something? Does he need to refinance his debt? Maybe they want to build yet another gigantic castle. They already have 3 (mega castles), and over 100 “regular” sized one, but I guess that’s not really enough, is it? The end paragraph really sums it up nicely:

I am so grateful for the Savior, who was the perfect example of obedience through sacrifice

That’s what any successful religion needs these days: complete obedience and submission from its members, especially the poor (who always seem to give more of their share than the rest, usually out of  desperation). Am I the only one who sees this as completely unappealing? When has submission ever been an admirable trait?

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This comic is in response to the Pope’s recent “Crusade” to try and blame environmental problems, societal degradation, and all the maladies of the world on secularism. Does he have any proof of these assertions? You must have forgotten about Papal Infallibility if you asked such a silly question!

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In tribute to Kirk’s release of the Origin of Species with a completely moronic and nonsensical 50 page abortion they call an intro (basically a smear campaign to villify Charles Darwin), I’ve decided to make the following comic. Enjoy!

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