Discuss: Does God have a dick?

Ok, this might sound like a stupid question, but consider the fact that religious folks love to claim that we were made in the image of God. If that’s true, does this all powerful entity have a penis? Let the speculation begin!

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Comments (15)

  • avatar

    jameswptv

    Some even say God is a woman.. so does she have a pussy?

  • avatar

    Brian

    Assuming there is a god and that it has a female human form and thus a pussy; what kind of bragging rights to rights do you get for tapping that?

  • avatar

    Jon

    If he does, it’s gotta be a little piggly-wiggly one. All those grand gestures like flooding the world, parting the red sea and reincarnating himself as a soap-dodging hippie carpenter who gets nailed to a cross makes you wonder if he’s overcompensating for something.

    Whether he’s cut or uncut, that’s anyone’s guess.

  • avatar

    J.N. Hudson

    If e are made in the “image of god” then the logical assumption would be that “god” is a hermaphrodite.

    Most fundamentaists (At least the ones that I was raised by), would have a coniption fit over the mere suggestion that “god” was a hermaphrodite and would vociferously insist (I asked) that only Adam, and therefore only men, were made in the image of “god” and women are just a “lesser reflection” of the glory that is there “god”. Of course, there are also those who would attest the exact opposite of that position (I dated one those people once who droned on and on ad infinitum about how “god” was really a woman).

    Then there are the fundies that ould balk at the idea that their “god” would posses an organ as base and inherently sinful as a penis, because (I have actually met someone who makes this claim) “god” is without sin and wholly uncapable of sin and (I laughed so hard I nearly pissed myself when I heard this) that the male and female genetalia is in fact the condensed sin of your entire lifetime placed on you before birth by the devil so you wil stray from the path that “god” has ordained for you (To which I responded “So size does matter”).

  • avatar

    Michael

    @J.N. Hudson

    Man was made in the image of god. Woman was made from man’s rib. So, I don’t think that the biblical god is a hermaphadite.

    ——————–

    It wouldn’t make any sense to me for an ever-existing being to have a gender in any case.

    However, if we accept the bible as a huge collection of accepted premises, then god is male. I mean, come one, what else would the whole “rod and staff” thing be about if not? (or the obsession with uninjured genitalia)

    If the character of God is a woman, then she’s very confused about herself.

  • avatar

    Jon

    …and to think, all those religious folks out there think that us Atheists can’t have deep philosophical discussions such as this on. Nice work, folks!

  • avatar

    JohnJay

    Well, Michaelangelo’s famous fresco on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel shows Adam with a navel.(that brings up some questions all by itself). So if he was made in God’s image … then God has a navel? So where did God’s umbilical attach to? All these questions!

  • avatar

    bobcat

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conception_of_God

    Hmm, some say god was both male and female. God and Lilith. Some say Lilith was merely God’s shadow. Terribly interesting. In this teaching, Lilith is as important as god and not merely a fallen angel. She was given the honor of bedding his first human, Adam, but she got upset and quit. Sucky job I guess…. in the bed.

  • avatar

    JohnJay

    @bobcat
    HaHa. Maybe Lilith got upset because of Adam’s, um, lack of endowment? Look at the Michelangeo’s Adam:
    http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2536/3971076305_31473781f9_o.jpg
    If he’s in God’s image, no wonder the old guy had such an inferiority complex… always demanding worship and acting like a jerk.
    No doubt some sort of natural selection has taken place over the millenia to evolve bigger and better nasty bits.

  • avatar

    ManBearPig

    He has to have a penis. I mean he’s fucking the world isn’t he?

  • avatar

    Wendy

    I can’t claim to know one way or another, but there’s one thing I can say for sure… If god has a dick, then logically there must be an equally powerful (yet hotter) goddess out there with a vagina. It’s just simple biology. Erm, simple HUMAN biology… Wait a minute……

  • avatar

    Joe Botelho

    Duh, he likes getting knocking up virgins.

  • avatar

    alastair

    na, hes like a ken doll, all smooth and genital less… but wouldnt that make him asexual or something, and then not a “him”
    Geeze apologizing is hard work, ill have to make up a really complex justification to work around this one <—– the motivation of all apologetics.

  • avatar

    Jacob Fortin

    Technically I think only the holy ghost has a dick…

  • avatar

    kent dolendo

    the truth is we eat just like a bitch and die like a shit!

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