This is kind of funny

A couple renewing in their vows in the Maldives had a bit of a surprise when it was discovered that the resort employee performing the ceremony was actually insulting the couple in his native tongue.

“You are swine. The children that you bear from this marriage will all be bastard swine…Your marriage is not a valid one. You are not the kind of people who can have a valid marriage…One of you is an infidel. The other too is an infidel and, we have reason to believe, an atheist who does not even believe in an infidel religion.”

Compared to the usual shit that seems to go down there, this is actually kind of funny. I mean, the guy spent a full 15 minutes spewing an impressive variety of insults. I’m not even sure I could manage such a bigoted tirade, and I can get pretty vile sometimes. It’s something to behold, really.

You might remember the Maldives being in the news a few months ago when a young air traffic controller “killed” himself when he was outed as an atheist. You’ll notice my use of italics above, since the circumstances around his death couldn’t possibly be fishier. This is the same island state that makes it compulsory to be a Sunni Muslim, so anyone caught being an apostate is in serious fucking trouble.

Sounds like a fucking swell place to visit; when are you guys booking your tickets?

Comments (3)

  • avatar


    Lol, loved it. Most annoying people on the planet are newly weds & middle aged western couples holidaying in 3rd world country’s they have zero understanding of.
    If behave incredibly stupidly on holiday, the locals are going to rip you off & take the piss out of you. And it’s what you deserve.

  • avatar


    This is where Katy Perry and Russell Brand are honeymooning for some goddamn reason.

  • avatar


    The Maladives is a country where it is illegal to NOT be Muslim. So yeah, this is a Islamist hell-hole with pristine beaches. What should we expect?

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