You’re Satan’s slave; didn’t you know that?


I guess that’s one way to scare the shit out of your parishoners. Who wants to be associated with freethinking when you’re worried a horned evil spirit will own your soul forever? Of course, once you realize Satan is no more real that Santa (a creepy anagram if I ever heard one) or the Tooth Fairy, it all seems like some pretty petty bullshit, doesn’t it?

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Comments (12)

  • avatar

    Wendy

    BAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    OMG I’m sorry, but you really have to pity the religious sometimes….

  • avatar

    Ben

    Yeah, don’t be a free-thinker! Listen and do what I say and life will be easy. Plus you won’t piss off the big guy in the sky! or me! I can’t believe people life being talked to like that. Shameful.

  • avatar

    Dave

    Satan’s slave? Must like a touch of bondage and a smidgen of flagellation, then! Where do I sign?

  • avatar

    J.N. Hudson

    Coming from an AOG family I can fairly confidently say that (if they are like any other AOG people I’ve met) they consider anyone who doesn’t agree with them 100% is a satanically controlled dupe.

  • avatar

    Roger

    Dagnabbit! Foiled again. But we could have gotten away with it if it wasn’t for that pesky iron-clad logic of AOG. (Said with my best Scooby Doo cartoon bad-guy voice)

    Back to the Devils’ drawing board to try again… well, I guess since I’m just one of Satan’s minions its actually back to wait for my next set of instructions form our great Atheist Lord, leaving the drawing board for the Big Red Guy himself. Such is the eternal battle of evil over Christiandom. :?

    Sincerely,
    Freethinker
    Controlled Dupe of Satan…. no,
    Slave of Satan.. yeah, that has kind of ring to it

  • avatar

    Mark

    They hate us for our freedom!

    Hold on a sec though cause the one thing you should not be free to do is think!

    What do they hate us for again?

    Damm, I am so confused!

  • avatar

    L.Long

    Of course we are. I’ve known that for years.
    Satan told me that the more conversions I make to atheism the higher my status is going to be in hell, and I have the added benefit of not having to follow all those damn ‘don’t do….’ rules of the psychotic sky-fairy.
    Its a win-win situation!!

  • avatar

    DaBigHotChocolate

    “Satan’s Slave?” Wasn’t that a crappy hair-metal band from the ’80′s? I think that the mentation necessary to determine whether this is true is greater than that applied by most of the slaves of Yahweh.

  • avatar

    Razzle

    This kinda looks like a sign made in one of those “create a sign” things on the internet.

  • avatar

    Greg

    Interesting. Someone should note the contradiction; a free thinker is no one’s slave. Believers, conversely, are required to be subservient.

  • avatar

    Wyatt

    ..I thought something felt funny.

  • avatar

    Seth

    But then, free thought and human volition is required to CHOOSE what one thinks is good. It is the freedom of thought that gives us the plausibility of seeking goodness and not evil alone.

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