Noah’s Ark discovery is a hoax

Man, I’m so sick of the search for what is essentially an ancient allegory about redemption; the story of Noah’s Ark isn’t supposed to be taken literally, but that hasn’t stopped people from trying to find the supposed location somewhere on Mt. Ararat. We know there was no global flood (there’s just not enough water for that to happen), and the distribution of animals around the world is a product of the continents separating from Pangaea roughly 250 million years ago . It was not the result of a 900 year old drunk and his incestuous family “saving” all the animals from God’s wrath. The fact anyone would entertain this story as reality demonstrates a rigidity of thinking and ignorance which can only come from religious faith.

The latest annoying “find” of Noah’s Ark comes from a Chinese filmmaker, who claims to be 99% sure that he’s found remains of the ship on Mount Ararat. Here’s a passage from their website:

Historical accounts dating back more than 2,000 years maintain that ‘Noah’s Ark came to rest in the mountains of Ararat after the Great Flood’. The same records can be found in the Bible and the Koran. In the local region, a saying passed down through the generations goes: ‘There is an ancient boat on the mountain’

So these historical records, are there any outside the Bible or the Koran, which is basically just a plagiarized version of the Old and New Testament? Yeah, I didn’t think so.

This hasn’t stopped these clowns from proclaiming with 99% certainty the wood they found must have definitely come from Noah’s Ark (sounds like they are rigorous scientists, doesn’t it?) There’s already mounting evidence the entire thing is a hoax, perpetrated by a bunch of creationists to make their religion seem a little more plausible.

To make a long story short: this is all reported to be a fake. The photos were reputed to have been taken off site near the Black Sea, but the film footage the Chinese now have was shot on location on Mt. Ararat. In the late summer of 2008 ten Kurdish workers hired by Parasut, the guide used by the Chinese, are said to have planted large wood beams taken from an old structure in the Black Sea area (where the photos were originally taken) at the Mt. Ararat site.

Wow, I’m so surprised all of this was total bullshit, and that moronic news organizations like Fox News and the National Post were tricked into thinking it was real (both organizations who cater to religious conservatives)! Guys, try doing a little research before posting a story. You’re making bullshit blogs like mine look almost professional by comparison.

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Comments (12)

  • avatar

    Darkpassenger

    This shit happens every couple of years they find a big piece of wood on a mountain or at the bottom of an old lake bed and claim they found Noah’s ark. Then some TV network dose a shitty document with some nautical, douche bag, bible thumping, retard who has been on a holy quest to find this stupid fucking ark his whole life. They usually find some pseudo scientist to take a sample of the wood and sending it to a “lab” where they get mixed results on the age of the wood by a factor of thousands of years(meaning the testing equipment was broken that day).Then the story ends, there is no more talk about it and the story is forgotten about. When will they learn its Just a story like the rest of the bible?

  • avatar

    Gauldar

    The sad thing is, there are Christians who feel they need evidence to back up their beliefs, but that concept is a complete contradiction. Faith requires there to be no evidence. Unfortunately it’s the ignorant ones that thrive, while those with a thirst for truth are taken for the fool.

  • avatar

    bobcat

    not sure i understand your plagiarism claim, but the concept that the modern stories in the old testament are plagiarized from many old religions passed on by word of mouth has a lot of evidence backing it up. there were many flood stories for instance.

  • avatar

    L.Long

    One of the ways they ‘proved it’ was carbon dating!!!
    Which they can’t use because they claim it is not accurate.
    The irony burns!!!

  • avatar

    Cherie M

    Any flood that DID take place was a purely local thing, passed into oral tradition and made larger, similar to the lore in the Epic of Gilgamesh. I wish people would realize that the old testament has many influences from other, older cultures just as the new testament does.

  • avatar

    Darkpassenger

    If a flood really happened on the scale they talk about in the story of Noah and the ark, you would find evidence of it in the rock layers all around the world. But sadly we find no such thing and the morons with evidence in hand will still claim there was an epic flood.

  • avatar

    BRENDON

    Nice Post. Very good article. I really apreciated your sharing this with us. Thank you

  • avatar

    Johan

    First let me start of by saying. Yes Noahs ark hasnt been found yet. I am a christian. About the global flood. It truely happend Gen 1:6 says and God said, let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters and let it divide the waters from the waters. That firmament is a water canopy. Before Noahs ark there were no rain. That is why Noah show the first rainbow. Temp was 27degree celcius the whole year. That water canopy broke causing it to rain over the entire earth. The great canyon wasnt created over mil of years it was caused by the flood! The fact that evolution created everything is a hoax and im more than willing to prove it.

  • avatar

    Johan

    Mail me il tel you why evolution, carbon dating and well anything that says the Bible is wrong is a big FAT LIE!

  • avatar

    Johan

    I geuss people are scared to take me on. Here is my email adress berg3699@gmail.com. I am willing to protect my God and prove that he exists.

  • avatar

    ghost

    for us christians we believe in the bible noahs flood happenned whether youre ready to admit it or not and johan im right there with you!!!!

  • avatar

    Kashtin

    Thanks for the post. I am getting sick of these illusioned morons in my class who blindly believe that ah ark actuall existed without a moments critical thought.

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