America, you still crazy


Normally, if you hear about a plot by an armed civilian militia trying to kill government officials, you figure it’s happening in some unstable developing country. It’s hard to believe in this day and age, the most powerful and wealthy country in the world also seems to have similar problems with armed maniacs trying to overthrow the present authority.

A few days ago, police and FBI agents arrested 9 home grown “terrorists” who were planning on killing a cop in order to later murder a bunch of police officers at his/her funeral. The small militia is composed entirely of Christian fundamentalists, and claim the name of the group, the”Hutaree” means “Christian warrior” (although by all accounts the word is simply made-up).

These religious nutjobs are very anti-government, and are convinced the former Secretary General of NATO, Javier Solana, is actually the Antichrist. Their plan is simple: to defend Christianity by waging war on those who oppose the divine authority of Jesus Christ (in other words, anyone who has half a brain). Their “About Us” page says it all (including the fact it’s illegible at times):

“We believe that one day, as prophecy says, there will be an Anti-Christ. All Christians must know this and prepare, just as Christ commanded…The Hutaree will one day see its enemy and meet him on the battlefield if so [sic] God wills it.”

This has to be the part of their scheme that confuses me the most. The Bible “predicts” the Antichrist will come, but this is all supposed to lead up to the event Christians call the Rapture, where true believers get whisked up to God’s magical-sky-playland. Only non-believers will be “left behind” to face-off against Jesus in the final conflict. So what exactly do these fundamentalists think their job is? Do they think they are responsible for bringing down the Anti-Christ and failing to let prophesy be fulfilled?

Of course you could argue religious nutbags simply find in their respective texts whatever they want to find; in this case, these paranoid weirdos needed some kind of moral justification for the twisted evil they were about to commit. This is what makes religions conviction so frightening; anyone wanting to find reason to harm, torture or kill their neighbor can find plenty of religious passages encouraging violence in their respective holy texts; there’s no limit to the kind of twisted logic you’ll be capable of if you put enough time and effort into looking for it. If you think there’s a difference between these assholes and the fuckfaces who blew up the World Trade Center, you’re underestimating just how crazy fundamentalists really are.

Comments (12)

  • avatar

    Infinite Monkey

    Now, I’ve heard of shotgun weddings, but AK-47 weddings?

  • avatar

    Richard

    Those are M16s that they are holding, not AK-47s. I know its irrelevant but just thought I’d point that out. And come to think of it, its actually a AR-15, the civilian version of the M16.

    And it would be one thing if the government was actually oppressive, then we could have a conversation if the use of force was justified. But these people are just insane. Not to mention that killing innocent police officers is just awful. I mean as a last resort, I would support an uprising against a tyrannical government, but this just isn’t the case. Not even close. I just think these delusional fucks shit all over genuine revolutions in which a truly oppressed peoples rose up against an oppressor.

  • avatar

    Hunter

    Next thing you know, they are gonna bring RPGs and Nukes to church dinners.

  • avatar

    Jeff

    Hahaha… all I had to read was the blog title and I cracked up. These Michigan militia are fuckin’ nuts! Did anyone see “Bowling for Columbine”?

    On an ironic note – these terdbaskets have all requested government-appointed public defenders.

  • avatar

    Eric

    UHHHH! Why did they have to be from Michigan?! It is the strangest thing. When I lived in Michigan (1973-1992) none of this nut job stuff was going on (at least they were not advertising it). I leave for boot camp and then come back a year later and the religious nuts come out of the wood works along with the Coo Coo for Coco Puffs Militias. What the F@$K?

    I guess I am gonna have to find a new state to retire in, any suggestions?

  • avatar

    Jeff

    Eric – not Missouri

  • avatar

    Liz

    I think it’s a little unfair to take an example like this where people are clearly off their rockers and basically say, “see…all you Christians are crazy!” Let them claim their faith as the reason for their twisted and crazed ideas. You can’t justify their scheme in any way by using the Bible, if read practically and in context. What they’ve done is amended (perhaps even rewritten) Scripture to give reason for their bizarre actions. Yes, they’re crazy. But it’s not because they’re Christians, because they’ve completely twisted and corrupted Christian truth. (Which would create the argument that they probably aren’t Christians to begin with.)

  • avatar

    Don Kroner

    Believe me friend, not all Christians are as insane as those guys and I think it’s unfair for you to tarnish us all with the same brush.

    People like that only cherry-pick parts out of the Bible to suit their agenda. They are not real believers.

  • avatar

    Bryan

    I can’t agree more with the headline. We (as a collective) have an overunity of fucking nuts (unlike the marginalized ratio of nuts in most other developed nations).

  • avatar

    Tom

    @ Don Kroner and Liz
    It’s the fact that the Bible not only leaves room for being read into ,by people like this, that makes it cause harm. Not only can it be interpreted to support any sort of nefarious action, but then it can be justified divinely.

  • avatar

    Liz

    can’t ANYTHING be read into and misinterpreted? that doesn’t mean Scripture is flawed, it means our perspective is flawed. think about it.

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