Who needs food and medicine when you have “The Proclaimer”?

Haiti is still suffering  from the aftermath of a devastating earthquake, and by all reports, there still isn’t enough food, water, and medicine to go around. Luckily, an organization called “Faith Comes By Hearing” has a solution for these desperate people; they are sending them 600 audio Bibles. The Proclaimer, as it’s called, is a solar powered / crank operated device that can blast out 15 hours of the New Testament for everyone to hear.

Peoples’ houses are crumbled, their families are shattered and they are living in ruins. Haitians will need that long-term hope and comfort that comes from knowing God has not forgotten them through this tragedy,” said Wilke

If you feel sick to your stomach from the fact that this organization is effectively using this tragedy to proselytize their stupid religion, you aren’t the only one. Aid delivery is by all accounts painfully slow, so these morons are taking up people’s valuable time delivering radios to people who need blankets, food and medicine rather than “the good word”.

There will be plenty of time for them to try and convince a population devastated by continual earthquakes that an invisible deity did this for some fucking reason (“He” works in some pretty mysterious ways, don’t you know), but now is not the fucking time. Stay the hell out of the way and let organizations that are actually helping people do their jobs properly. If you still think they need your stupid radios, this quote might help you gain some perspective on the situation down there:

“We were forced to buy a saw in the market to continue amputations,” the group’s Loris de Filippi told the Reuters news agency in Cite Soleil.

Does your fucking radio play loud enough to drown out the sound of screaming?

Comments (5)

  • avatar


    This is the very reason why I NEVER give to faith charities, unless I know that none of the donations will fund a supply of bibles or sending missionaries to rub salt into the wounds of those who have suffered an ‘Act of God’ as the insurers used to say! I mean, when you’re injured, homeless, thirsty and starving a bible is just what you need to get you through the days of suffering and misery that lay ahead.

    These fuckwit religious tossers simply don’t have a clue do they!

  • avatar


    shit, where to start?
    i want one. hacked to play Hitchens’. “Portable Atheist”!

    it’s “a gift from God. Why? Because the inspiration for it came during three days of fasting and prayer” SWEET! so… how much IS the gift from god? you have to CALL to find out. i didn’t.

    “Proclaimer”. great name. one-hit wonder you’ve probably already heard:

    always leery of charities in general, but “Foundation Beyond Belief” is a new one worthy of mention as a secular alternative. [no affiliation, went through them for research/future reference]

  • avatar


    After the church service was over, one lady turned to the other and said “God has been good to us today”. The second lady asked why that was. The first lady said her son had been in a serous car crash that morning and that God had saved his life. The second lady said “My son was in the same crash and he got killed.”

  • avatar


    Yay! They’re saved!

  • avatar


    That was sarcasm, by the way. Apparently, even phony html tags don’t show up here.

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