Spiritual mathematics

You have to love guys like Jerry Falwell and the twisted way they persuade people to give them money. Here he is giving people what is perhaps the worst financial advice I’ve ever heard: if you don’t have a lot of money, it’s because you aren’t giving enough of it to your church. I guess God is for sale, and in Jerry’s case, business was always booming. It’s no secret this guy was rich. ¬†How can you not be when people are giving you 10% of their salary?

In a weird way, I have to admit I’m a little jealous. Here I am, busting my ass producing quality podcasts, and asking people to donate money, but I’m still a broke-ass, while evangelical preachers who spend their time tricking people out of their hard earned cash get to drive around in expensive cars. My audience is comprised mostly of highly intelligent and independent thinkers who are naturally skeptical, so fooling you guys out of money is practically impossible. Instead, I have to appeal to your sense of value. Hey, here’s an idea: why don’t you become a member and enjoy all of our bonus podcasts that we record for your listening pleasure! It’s only 20 bucks a year, and in return you get hours of radio goodness. I don’t need a fancy car, but I would like to make enough money to pay rent. That’s not too greedy, is it?

(props to Duane for the link!)

Comments (4)

  • avatar


    Yeah, I don’t get how they get away with asking for money, isn’t that simony: http://www.britannica.com/EBchecked/topic/545275/simony

    In the documentary Marjoe, one female preachers asks for a “sacrifice for Jesus” offering were you should give that money that you need for paying bills, “that new dress you have been saving for” etc etc. Needless to say it was the richest church he went to. It was also mostly African Americans people, and I believe African Americans typically didn’t make a ton of money on the average in the early 70′s.

    found a link to that scene (about 5:20 into the video) : http://www.atheistnation.net/video/?video/02073/atheist/marjoe-part-6-exposing-evangelicals/

  • avatar


    Dude, you should also promise free crap. Healed lameness, a place in heaven with a few more extra virgins then you get in the stock model, perhaps the power to cast out evil spirits by forcefully pushing people over backwards, lessons in preoper snake-handling maybe.

  • avatar


    You could try and trick us but for some reason I don’t think that will quite work. Just tell yourself that even though your broke, you’re not blowing smoke up our asses!

  • avatar


    hahahahahahahahahaha ok i cant believe this guy. i work for a collection agency and being pretty good at math id say that’s not how you budget

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